http://www.bignewsreport.org Your Only News-Based Comedy News Source Tue, 06 Jan 2009 22:21:00 +0000 http://backend.userland.com/rss092 en As we get closer to the historic inauguration of the 44th president of the United States, Barack Obama, many people are excited.  Obama has been a galvanizing force through his impressive public speaking ability, and he has united Americans on both sides of the aisle with his message of hope.  ... http://www.bignewsreport.org/2009/01/06/the-problem-with-barack-obama/ Big News celebrates its sixth year anniversary and its 300th episode, with our very special guest Emo Philips!!! And what did we get for this auspicious occasion? Why, news that the governor of Illinois tried to sell Barack Obama's Senate seat! So if you weren't among the 90 or ... http://www.bignewsreport.org/2009/01/06/watch-big-news-episode-300-i-rod-with-emo-philips/ Chip Saltsman, a candidate for chairman of the Republican National Committee, continues to face criticism for distributing a CD that contained the song parody “Barack the Magic Negro.” Some Democrats have defended Saltsman by noting that on January 20th Obama will in fact make a giant asshole disappear. Chrysler has ... http://www.bignewsreport.org/2009/01/05/big-news-report-for-the-week-ending-sunday-january-4-2009/ It was bad enough that Bernie Madoff put together the largest Ponzi scheme in history to steal $50 billion from charities, financial institutions and retirees. But this week, we got news of victims even more tragic: Madoff lost the $50 million life savings of beloved Hollywood supercouple Kevin Bacon ... http://www.bignewsreport.org/2009/01/04/six-degrees-of-kevin-bacon-economic-crisis-edition/ It was the week the government officially declared the US to be in a recession - but there's no shortage of laughs in episode 298 of Big News! In this episode: - Rosie O'Donnell bursts into Barack Obama's national security press conference! - New Line Cinema announces the sequel to "Four Christmases!" - Chris ... http://www.bignewsreport.org/2008/12/31/watch-big-news-episode-298-recession-proof/ Caroline Kennedy said Friday that she would have to work twice as hard as others if she is selected to be a U.S. Senator. The extra work will go towards not being murdered. Nuclear powers India and Pakistan moved closer to war, as tensions rose in the region. The ... http://www.bignewsreport.org/2008/12/31/big-news-report-for-the-week-ending-sunday-december-28-2008/ On the twelfth day after Boxing Day, my true love gave to me... Twelve hours of uninterrupted online porn viewing, Eleven self-help books to combat porn addiction, Ten top ten lists of 2008, Nine bottles of rum for frozen daiquiris since we both like girly drinks, Eight days of hangovers,  A pass to see "Seven Pounds"  (since ... http://www.bignewsreport.org/2008/12/28/big-news-report-for-the-week-ending-sunday-december-28-2008-bonus-jokes/ The Iraqi journalist who threw his shoes at President Bush began his trial Wednesday on charges of attacking a head of state. When asked to predict the outcome, the judge in the case said a guilty verdict is a virtual shoo-in. Time magazine has named Barack Obama its “Person of ... http://www.bignewsreport.org/2008/12/22/big-news-report-for-the-week-ending-sunday-december-21-2008/ Now, through the miracle of virtual reality, the power of the internets, and a complete lack of respect for authority, you can become Time's Man of the Year*, Muntadhar al-Zeidi, the infamous Iraqi Shoe Thrower, hero to millions and soon to be host of Fox TV's American Infidol**. Take off ... http://www.bignewsreport.org/2008/12/19/shoe-sniper-condition-dubya/ The proposed bailout of the American auto industry broke down Thursday night after Senate Republicans blocked its passage. Making matters worse, the bailout broke down right after its warranty had expired. The bailout plan rejected by the Senate would have had the car industry overseen by a government ... http://www.bignewsreport.org/2008/12/15/big-news-report-for-the-week-ending-sunday-december-14-2008/